In a culture where everyone is a “friend” it is often illusory who we consider to be in our inner circle. The beauty of our world today is that we have a huge community and network of friends, friends of friends, and connections to people we’ve never met that we still call friends. There is great beauty in this. Our social relationships are a key part of our health, so it is also important from time to time to take stock of our inner circle. You’ve heard “blood is thicker than water”, which usually applies to family. This can also apply to our inner circle; our inner circle has made a social and psychological pact to support one another, in a healthy way, through all of life’s ups and downs —which is why we should evaluate from time to time who is in our IC’s.
I’m sure there is a formal definition of “inner circle” somewhere, but to me it means this: Your IC is the group of people closest to you. They are the people you turn to without hesitation when you have something to celebrate or if you need help. They are the people you trust without question, and the people who willingly and lovingly lift you up. They are the people in the world that want you to succeed and be happy. They are the people who give with no expectation of anything in return. Your inner circle has your back, makes you laugh, sits with you through pain and set-backs, they push you to keep going and keep growing, they challenge you and hold you steady at the same time. Some would call their inner circle, their tribe. In this group the members check their egos at the door; there are no competitors; there are no winners or losers; the veneer of this group has long ago faded and all that remains is a group of people living in this world supporting, loving, and cheering one another on. This is the group that you can say, “I love you” daily and mean it. They are also the group of people you can say, “WTF, this sucks, let’s go have a glass of wine” and they are by your side immediately. This is how I define my IC.
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I am immensely grateful for my Inner Circle, and for all the ways they help me stay healthy and challenged on a regular basis.
Give some love to your IC today.
And, if there’s someone in your IC that doesn’t fit the description above it might be time to fire him or her from your IC—just a thought!
Dr. Shanna
Photo Credit: My Inner Circle, Vail, Colorado Aug, 2015
